How to Control ANGER Quickly: 23+ Best Anger Management Tips to Help You Calm

Jun 14, 202411 min
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Manasvi Dodiya
Scientific Writer | Microbiologist
a boy is calm and controlled the tamper and girl is showing anger towards a boy- how to control anger

What is Anger?

Anger is an emotion that arises when you feel wronged by an individual or by circumstances.  

Experiencing anger at certain levels can be a good thing. It can become a gateway to release pent-up tension and can motivate you to find solutions. It can also help you compete and perform better. 

However, anger becomes problematic when you can't control it and when it starts to affect you and everyone around you. When anger in unmanaged, it can take a toll on your mental and physical health. Health conditions like high blood pressure, physical changes, depression, cardiovascular disease are seen to be associated with unmanaged anger. Learning how to manage anger is crucial for one’s well-being. It would be beneficial to learn how to control anger instead of letting it control us.  You have to learn to control it instead of letting it control you. 

What Part Of The Brain Controls Anger And Anger Hormones?

Anger is driven by the amygdala. Amyglada is an almond-shaped part of the brain that is associated with emotions, especially anger. It helps regulate the level of emotions an individual experiences in many situations. 

A person can also experience something called an amygdala hijack. This occurs when the amygdala activates the flight or fight response even when there is no serious threat. It hijacks the ability of a person to respond rationally to a threat. This can happen as a result of prolonged stressful situations.  Our body also releases some stress hormones that contribute to anger. Cortisol is a stress hormone that helps our body regulate our body’s stress response. Elevated cortisol levels may exacerbate feelings of anger and aggression. Adrenaline, produced by the adrenal glands in our body also affects the expression of anger. 

Testosterone is another hormone that influences anger. It is generally associated with dominance and assertiveness and it is linked to aggression. These hormones affect the response and level of anger for all individuals. 

What Are The Triggers Of Anger? 

If you want to find out the root cause of your anger, you need to dive deep to understand the nature of your triggers. You may find that certain situations or feelings can cause a surge of emotions, leading you to get angry. You can trace them by introspecting on your reactions to situations in the past. Some of these triggers might follow a common pattern. If you cannot trace them, simply ask these questions: 

What were the circumstances?

Did someone say or do something to trigger your anger?

How did you feel?

How did you act?

How did you feel afterward?

Asking these questions can help us understand the cause of anger and point out our triggers. Once you recognize these triggers you can learn how to control them effectively.

Understanding the science behind anger and what causes it is only half the job done. If anger is not managed correctly, it can affect your work, relationships, and health. Here are 26 anger management tips to help you control anger. Please note that these are general tips and work best as preventive tools rather than using them during a full-blown anger outburst. 

Calm Down Quickly: 25 Practical Tips To Control Anger in 2024

1.Focus on your breathing:

Getting angry directly affects your breathing rate. It gets shallow and much faster. Taking deep breaths can help you pause at that moment. It can calm you down and reverse the effect that anger has on you. 

2.Practice staying quiet:

Anger can bring along many aggressive actions. One of them is speaking hurtful words. For example, you are angry at your partner for not doing the laundry on time. In a moment of anger, you may say harsh words like, “ I wonder why I married you. You can't even do simple laundry!” 

You might not mean those words but it can damage your relationship in the future. Instead, practice going quiet for a while when you feel that you might say or act in a hurtful manner.

3.Adopt a third-person point of view:

It may feel difficult to sit back and analyze what led you to get angry. Adopting a third-person point of view means taking yourself out of the situation and observing it as somebody other than you and the person/situation you are angry with.

4.Meditate:

This one might be the most preached technique. If you have frequent outbursts of anger, it is advisable to keep it in check. Meditation helps with emotional regulation and helps us to remain calm and thoughtful. Learning how to master the art of meditating deeply might take time, but you can start your journey with a 15-minute meditation routine regularly.  You can control it by meditation. It can help you destress and calm down. It also brings clarity and the power to make better decisions. 

A girl is meditating to calm her anger

5.Exercise: 

You can channel your anger into exercising. When angry, our body has an adrenaline rush which leads to a sudden surge in energy. You can use this energy to exercise and release some of the anger. If you do not have the time to go to a gym, a few jumping jacks in your room may also help. Here we got covered the relationship between Physical and Mental Health 

6.Journal:

Anger brings in a wave of mixed emotions which can make you feel vulnerable. Instead of fighting it or letting it out on someone, you can try writing down what you are feeling. Writing down your thoughts might help you analyze the situation in a better manner. You can make a flowchart of what led you to get angry and if your reaction could have altered the situation. 

Another way is to dump what’s on your mind on paper. Just write and write until you feel that you have emptied everything inside your mind. Once you have emptied your mind, you will feel calmer. 

7.Take help of melodies:

Music listening may have a modulatory effect on anger and stress responses. It possesses the power to uplift mood instantly. Listening to music has a proven record of improving mood instantly. So next time you feel angry - let's say your senior embarrassed you in front of others, just listen to soothing music….or any music that can calm you down. You can also gently tap your toes and hands in case you cannot resist dancing!

8.Talk to a buddy:

Talking to a trusted friend who understands you can help you manage your anger. For example, you have had a very bad day at work. Your senior insulted you in front of the entire office. It was not your fault and yet you had to bear the consequences. It makes you angry and also has an unsettling feeling.  

In such cases, you can turn to a close friend to talk about your concerns. They problem might not be resolved instantly but talking to a friend eases the burden a little. After all, what's better than a heart-to-heart with your buddy?

9.Set a timer:

Staying angry for a long period can eventually turn into overthinking. Let's take this scenario - You had a fight with your father regarding career decision. You try to reason with him but he can’t understand your point. You get angry and isolate yourself from everybody. Now that you've fought, you ruminate over it for a long time and start to wonder if choosing this career was wise or not. 

In such cases, you can set a timer for yourself. You can get angry or ruminate over the moment for only a specific amount of time. If the incident requires problem-solving, take a step back and allow yourself to calm down first. After the timer goes off, you can perform another activity to take your mind off this incident.  

10.Harness your creative energy:

Anger brings with it a surge in energy levels. You can use this to channel your anger into something creative. It may be dancing, painting, writing, singing, etc. 

You don't have to be a professional at it. Just simply let it all out. Move around in fast circles, use bold colors for painting, write poems about life, and sing in your loudest voice. 

11.Stop listening to the little devil:

Anger brings with it a little devil on your shoulder with unwarranted thoughts and opinions.

Try to stop listening to it and move away from the voices. For example, your child disappointed you by getting low scores in her examinations. The little devil tells you to speak harsh words and instill fear so that she can score better next time. 

Such situations will lead you to react aggressively and might lead to undesired consequences. Instead of listening to the little devil, you can simply say “NO” to the little devil. Do not cave in and approach the situation with a constructive attitude. You can tell your child that it is okay to not perform well in the exams. You can let the child tell about the difficulties they faced and both of you can then work unanimously to resolve the issue. 

12.Play an advocate:

This might require you to embody an advocate. Try justifying the actions that made you angry. It can be the actions of others or yourself. There can be two outcomes to this.

A. If you can justify the action, you gain clarity over the situation and you calm down instantly.

B. If you cannot justify, you can analyze the situation carefully and come up with a fruitful solution 

For example, your teenage son is throwing a tantrum because he wants to go to a party at night. You get angry over the fact that he is throwing a tantrum. You can play the advocate.

Are my son's actions justified? 

If yes, then I can understand and allow him to go to the party. 

If not, then I can reason with him and make him understand in a better manner. 

13.Tap-tap-tap: 

This is a form of physical exercise that can help you contain your anger and prevent it from getting worse. There will be situations where you cannot help but lose your temper. In such cases, you can gently tap on your thighs, cheeks, hands, or even a table. 

This practice can help stop you from making any rash decisions or doing anything out of spite. It brings you back to the present and makes you more calmer.

14.Take a note of lessons learned:

It is easy to get angry when things don't go your way. It is also easy to judge yourself too harshly when you do not achieve what you want.  Instead of questioning it, just keep in mind that you are a work in progress.  

For example, Mira was upset and angry that she could not clear her competitive exams in a single attempt. Instead of questioning the situation, she simply took note of what went wrong in the exam. This experience helped her understand the level of preparation that is required to clear the examinations. 

Similarly, you can also practice taking note of all the learnings you had from the situations that made you angry. Dealing with anger becomes easy and so does accepting the situation.

15.Repeat a mantra:

Repeating a mantra that can help you differentiate between the angry you and the real you can be helpful. 

For example, next time you get angry, repeat - Anger is a choice and I choose to react differently. “As long as I keep my cool, I am in control of myself.” 

It is a simple mantra but a useful one. You can make a mantra of your own. It can be anything that controls your anger. 

16.Empathize:

When you hold anger against someone, try to empathize with them. Try to understand the reason behind their actions. It will help you gain a new understanding of the behavior. It might also help you tackle the situation better. 

17.Splash cold water on your face:

Being angry might result in you functioning in an overdrive mode. You can use cold water to help you halt instantly. It can help you cope with anger and manage it accordingly.  If you cannot find cold water, you can splash normal water on your face. As much as cold water does the job, normal water might help manage your anger just as well. 

18.Observe the patterns: 

You might observe certain patterns or triggers for your anger.  For example, you often get angry at your partner for not being punctual. This might push your partner away.

19.Practice calming visualization:

Imagine getting so angry that you cannot comprehend any positive thought. It can lead you to spiral into a whirlwind of negative emotions. In such cases, you can close your eyes, focus on your mind, and visualize a place or an event that made you feel safe or calm in the past. It helps you to regain your composure and contain your anger. Practicing this can supply you with the power to react differently and help you remain grounded. 

20.Practice Yoga:

Performing yoga stretches and relaxes muscles which in turn helps improve the overall well-being of a person.

A study revealed that practicing yoga reduces the levels of anger in people.  They selected 24 healthy women for the study and the participants were supposed to follow the 12-week Yoga training program to understand its effect on somatization, psychological symptoms, and stress-related biomarkers. The study concluded that yoga benefited the participants by improving their scores related to mental health indicators, such as anger, depression, anxiety, and fatigue.

21.Go for a walk:

If managing anger is becoming too stressful at the moment, go for a walk. It can calm your nerves and help you to compose yourself. You might not calm down completely but taking a walk will allow you to pause and distance yourself from the situation so that you can think about it with more clarity. 

22.Seek professional help:

If you think that unmanaged anger is affecting you and the people around you, seeking help from a professional is advisable. Mental health professionals can help you recognize your triggers, and navigate through the problems. They can also provide you with some tips to follow when you feel your anger rising. 

23.Think of a happy memory

Thinking of the moments when you were happy can reduce your anger. These happy memories help reduce the negativity and release serotonin which is known to improve your mood in general. Improvement in mood automatically reduces your anger. 

24.Help people 

Acts of kindness or acts of service can help you get a sense of satisfaction and happiness. 

If you encounter an incident that has made you angry for a long time, you can help people in need. You might not forget the situation entirely but the effect that anger has on you can be reduced.  When we help others, it releases endorphins like oxytocin in our body which are known as the “feel-good” chemicals. These endorphins trigger a positive feeling in the body and might help you to calm down and increase self-esteem. 

25.Brain stimulation:

Brain stimulation is a scientific approach for people with anger management issues. Non-invasive brain stimulation therapies like tDCS (transcranial direct current stimulation), TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation), and tACS (transcranial alternate current stimulation) can help you manage your anger. These therapies use a small amount of electric current/magnetic field to excite the affected areas of the brain. This enhances cognitive functioning and is being used in clinical settings for treating chronic pains, anger management issues, depression, bipolar disorder, etc. 

Mave Health’s ARC-tDCS provides the best help in the area of NIBS. With the help of tDCS technology and experienced medical professionals, they provide a fruitful solution for your problem. 

Conclusion:

Everybody gets angry over some or other inconvenience in life. Just like disappointments can’t be avoided, even anger cannot. Anger can have a lot of consequences if not managed correctly. 

Learning to control your anger takes time. But once you learn it, you can improve your quality of life and relationships.

At Mave Health, we believe that circumstances cannot be changed but your reaction to them can. If anger is coming your way, we can help you manage it. With exceptional psychologists and the breakthrough ARC-tDCS technology, Mave Health can help you work through challenges and come closer to a state of well-being. 

References:

  1. Anger Management | Harvard Medicine Magazine [WWW Document], n.d. URL  (accessed 6.1.24).
  2. Anger management: 10 tips to tame your temper [WWW Document], n.d. . Mayo Clin. URL  (accessed 6.1.24).
  3. Blair, R.J.R., 2012. Considering anger from a cognitive neuroscience perspective. Wiley Interdiscip. Rev. Cogn. Sci. 3, 65–74. 
  4. Mitts, C., 2018. Understanding anger triggers | What causes emotional triggers. Ipseity Couns. Denver. URL (accessed 6.1.24).
  5. Strategies for controlling your anger: Keeping anger in check [WWW Document], n.d. . https://www.apa.org. URL (accessed 6.1.24)
Author's Profile picture
Manasvi Dodiya
Scientific Writer | Microbiologist
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